Shaadi Shopping: Subcontinental Style

By
Ismat Sarah Mangla
Published: June 20, 2007Posted in: Best of Nirali Magazine, Style, WeddingsTags:
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lanning a wedding—no matter how small—is no small task. Planning an Indian, Pakistani or other South Asian wedding? In North America? Well, that’s downright Herculean. And not just because you’re managing multiple events and meddling family members—after all, you can’t just saunter over to David’s Bridal to find the accessories that make desi weddings desi: lenghas and saris and bangles and mehndi and on and on. And while there are now many resources for South Asian brides in North America, you’re still going to find the best selection back on the Subcontinent.

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But taking a wedding shopping trip to India or Pakistan (likely for just two weeks) can be a daunting experience. That’s why we talked to the experts to make it a little bit easier for you. Read on to find out what you need to know before you go and while you’re there, and where to shop in New Delhi, Bombay, Karachi and Lahore. We’ve created a list—though not exhaustive by any means—of shops and markets specifically recommended by our experts. Don’t see your favorite shop included? Tell us in the comments. We’ll periodically update this story with new listings. (And don’t forget to check out More Real Tips From Desi Brides—it features a whole section on recent brides’ best tips for shopping abroad.)

Perfect Your Plan

Make a list, and check it twice. “Don’t underestimate how much you need to get done in that trip,” says Priya Narwani of Hitch Free, an Indian wedding planning and shopping service. In addition to clothing and jewelry, there will be a host of other items your parents and in-laws will probably need to buy, such as gifts for family members or wedding accoutrements. “Your parents are going to start thinking about what they will give the in-laws at the function, whether it’s a basket of chocolates or whatever. Suddenly, they’ll get to India and say, ‘I need to buy a silver tray to present it on’.” Narwani says that in order to know what you’ll need to shop for on your trip abroad, ask your parents and in-laws to help you create a list on paper ahead of time. “It’s never going to be a complete list, but you should have something to start with,” she says. “Indian parents are a lot more on the fly. It’s amazing the amount of knowledge the elders have, but it’s all sitting in their heads. You have to push them.”

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Senoraa, Chenaii. (Claude Renault)

Get help from the locals. “Every family has the super aunt who knows everything about what you’re supposed to do. We always think she’s interfering,” says Narwani. “But when it comes to wedding shopping, she’s going to be your godsend. Love her and have her on your side. Contact her ahead of time to find out what you need to do. Don’t wait until you get to India.”

Don’t over-schedule your shopping days. “You have to plan your days while you’re there,” says Sandhya Jain-Patel, founder of Xari Couture. “You need an itinerary. In Delhi and Bombay, for example, the traffic is really bad. You think you’ll get three things done in a day, but you’ll really only finish one.” Jain-Patel suggests consulting with local experts or family members before undertaking an overly ambitious itinerary. “Say, these are the 10 things I want to buy while I’m here,” she says. A local will be able to tell you realistically how much time you need. It’s also helpful to get advice on where to stay and how to get around.

Personal Shopper

If you need help with shopping for your wedding trousseau, look no further than Priya Narwani of Hitch Free. In addition to wedding planning and day-of coordination, Narwani offers a unique service: personal accompaniment to India for wedding shopping assistance and merchandise transportation. She will guide you through her network of tailors and other shopping sources to put together the perfect trousseau. And because she works with so many vendors on a repeat basis, Narwani claims that she can get the best prices for her clients. Just need some suggestions from Narwani before you go? She can do that, too. Rates start at $100 for consultation and increase depending on the services selected. Visit www.hitchfree.com for details.

Bring an entourage. “When you’re shopping, it’s important to have an elder with you who knows the culture, the etiquette, the language,” says Jain-Patel. “If you go alone, you’ll get taken advantage of. You want someone who will watch out for you.”

Designing That Dream Dress

Make appointments with designers in advance. If you plan on meeting with bridal designers while you’re in India and Pakistan, don’t expect face time unless you’ve made an appointment. “Get an appointment at least two weeks before you need it,” says Saadia Zaheer, a graduate of the Pakistan School of Fashion Design who has helped plan trousseaus for dozens of weddings. “Make them from North America before you go. Sometimes you can just walk in if the designer has an outlet, but you won’t actually be able to meet with the designer without an appointment.”

Work your connections. “With many designers, you need to know someone just to get an appointment,” says Nikki Khan of Exquisite Events in Los Angeles. If you don’t have a contact who knows a designer personally, try to get a reference from someone who has worn their work in the past. Any connection helps, so mention as many names as possible.

Time your trip right. Zaheer says that most designers need five to six months to create a bridal outfit, and during busy seasons, they may just turn you away. “August to December is the high season, so try to give your orders in the winter or spring. There are fewer weddings in the summer, so they have more time then.” But know that many designers travel during the summer and get a lot of requests from Western visitors around the same time, so plan in advance as much as possible. Expect December, especially, to be a hectic month.

Set things in motion from home. Can’t make it India or Pakistan in time to start the process? Khan suggests establishing contact via telephone. “Tell them what you’re looking for, give them your budget, send a deposit and have them start working. A lot of designers now have Web sites, and you can discuss what you want based on the collections they showcase online.”

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Shopping in Karachi. (Zofka)

Consider ready-to-wear or off-the-rack creations. “If you don’t have a lot of time, there are good options at the established boutiques and fashion houses,” says Zaheer. Adds Narwani, “When we talk off-the-rack here, we turn up our nose. But India has an amazing range for off-the-rack bridal wear.”

Research styles and designs you like in advance. “Buy as many magazines as you can get, even if it means ordering them from London. It doesn’t matter how old they are,” suggests Jain-Patel. Use photos from those magazines and from Web sites to get an idea of what you want before you go.

Create a wedding notebook. Jain-Patel swears by an all-purpose notebook that you can take with you on your shopping excursions. Include the pictures from your research, alongside everyone’s measurements. You can even trace foot measurements right into it. “If you like a particular motif or material, cut it out and put it in there,” says Jain-Patel. “Then, when you go to India, you can specify what you definitely want on your outfit. It will also help illustrate what you mean, because in India, the same styles can have different or multiple names.”

Dress to impress. If you’re meeting with designers and shopping in fine jewelry stores, don’t plan on wearing tattered jeans and flip flops. “You should wear nice clothes and dress up when you meet with them,” says Zaheer. The designers are also auditioning you, and people are more image conscious on the Subcontinent than they may be here. And when working with designers, you may need to massage their egos a bit. If you don’t like a particular style, be tactful with your words.

Accelerate the deadline. South Asian tailors and designers are notorious for getting things done at the last minute. While you may be used to telling vendors your exact deadline, you may want to use a slightly earlier date for dressmakers to avoid last-minute panics.

Measuring Up

Wear the right bra. When getting your fittings, wear the kind of bra you’ll wear on your wedding day—”something that will give you shape,” advises Jain-Patel. “They will alter your clothes to what you’re wearing.”

Give them a sample. Recent bride Nadia Samadani advises bringing a blouse that fits you well and leaving it with the tailor, even if he has your measurements.

Trousseau Assistance

Sandhya Jain-Patel of clothing and home fashion company Xari Couture knows India—especially shopping there. She spent time living in India and working with numerous tailors and craftsmen, so she understands how artisans work. She has translated that into a consulting service for South Asian brides who need help putting together their trousseaus. Jain-Patel typically requires six months or more to work with each bride, but she brings with her a wealth of information. And her tips and tricks can make it easy for you to get what you need. For example, “I have a car service there that’s absolutely impeccable—they know every single place in Delhi.” For more information, contact her through www.xaricouture.com.

Make sure things don’t hurt. When you’re trying on lenghas or other fitted clothes, Jain-Patel suggests trying them on bare skin, because “a lot of times, the embellishments can pinch. Mukaish, which is an embellishment of tiny rhinestones or disks of beaten silver or gold, “feels like thousands of little ant bites.” To remedy such problems, make sure your clothes come with a good lining.

Get a cotton mock-up. Most good designers will construct a completely tailored sample according to your measurements in plain cotton, says Zaheeer. They will test this on you before starting any of the actual cutting and kaam. If they don’t, ask them about it.

Consider a second trip. Samadani says that “If you can possibly make two trips so you can do the fitting, do it. When you’re in Pakistan you can be on top of the designers and follow up with them right away.”

Bargaining for your budget

Save every receipt. Whenever you put down a payment, paste the receipt into your wedding notebook and write down exactly what you’re buying, advises Jain-Patel. You’ll save yourself from hassles later.

Get a jewelry receipt. When buying fine jewelry, “you can ask for a proper receipt that will tell you how many stones, total carat weight, cost, etc. They may charge you a bit more for it, but it’s worth it,” says Jain-Patel. “You’ll have protection if you want to exchange it later, and it can be useful for insurance appraisals here.”

Know that you can design a dress within your budget. “Every designer will ask you for your range,” says Zaheer. “Be honest. They will present you with styles that fall in that range.” And whether you’re in India or Pakistan, you can always adjust the price according to the amount of “kaam” (the embroidery, beadwork and sequining) on the outfit. “If you like an outfit that costs 400,000 rupees, you can ask whether they can tailor it to 200,000 rupees. Designers are willing to do that.”

Do your homework on prices. You may expect that you’ll be able to bargain everywhere you shop, but that’s not necessarily the case. Narwani says that many bridal stores in India offer fixed prices, which she prefers. Still, if you’re buying many outfits from one place, it doesn’t hurt to ask for a bulk discount. As for designers, Zaheer claims that “you can bargain with them, no matter how big they are.”

Of course, haggling in “earthier” markets is commonplace, but you may want to have a local with you—most shopkeepers can smell Westerners from miles away.

When it comes to jewelry, expect to be able to bargain 20 percent off the price, particularly in Pakistan, though Zaheer warns that “Coming from outside, it can be harder. Women in Pakistan, when they shop, will wear jewelry when they go to show that they know prices. So it’s especially important to take a local with you for jewelry shopping.”

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Flower seller. Gujrat, Pakistan. (Azlan H.)
Your invite itinerary

Plan your invitations in advance. “If you’re buying your invitations there, discuss with your parents and fiancé about what’s going to be on the card ahead of time,” says Narwani. If you take your wording with you, you can get a mock-up much sooner. Take proofread copy with you so you’re not trying to come up with it in a frenzy.

Keep postage in mind. “While Indian wedding cards are beautiful,” says Jain-Patel, “make sure you factor in the cost of mailing. I had a friend who had lavish cards made only to find out that they cost $2 a card to mail them in the U.S.” Have postage requirements with you, and keep in mind any inserts you’ll have to include. If you’re getting fabric invitations, says Jain-Patel, you can find plastic sleeves for postage and addresses.

Bombay City Guide: Page 2
New Delhi City Guide: Page 3
Lahore City Guide: Page 4
Karachi City Guide: Page 5

For a complete list of Indian and Pakistani bridal designers, see page 2 of Vow to Wow.

Ismat Sarah Mangla is dreaming of a shopping trip to the Subcontinent.
Published on June 18, 2007.
Photography: Main image by Asad Chaudary. All other photographs courtesy of the photographers noted and designers and businesses featured.

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